


Dialogue Prompts! Fun Times!

by LiterallyCantChooseJustOneFandom



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other, Prompt Fic, Self Prompt, Tumblr Prompt, Writing, Writing Exercise
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-12 01:05:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15328350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiterallyCantChooseJustOneFandom/pseuds/LiterallyCantChooseJustOneFandom
Summary: I wrote 25 new prompts, and if you want me to write them for any of the above fandoms and with any of the pairings within.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So if you have a fic request, you can tell me down in the comments.

1.) “The enthusiasm with which I punch people has nothing to do with what’s in their pants or how they identify. I have and equal-opportunity sense of violence.”  
2.) “Wow, this ice cream tastes terrible.” “Maybe because you shot the guy eating it, and his blood landed alongside the mint chips.”  
3.) “Remind me again why I keep loaning you money when I know you’re going to spend it on weapons?”  
4.) “Admit it: you think I’m sexy when I start prison riots.”  
5.) “Why did you knock him out?!” “He was bossing you around.” “He is my boss! It’s literally his job to boss me around!”  
6.) “Remind me again why you insulting the heir to the Russian mob means I have to make Russian foods I can't pronounce the names of?”  
7.) “Fantastic. Now this is rich.” “No, now we’re rich.”  
8.) “Why is the ceiling on my bed?”  
9.) “Blood pudding doesn’t mean put blood in the pudding. Actually, I’ve never had blood pudding before, don't ask me.”  
10.) “So what you’re saying is…” “Yes, (insert name here), you can punch them if you want to.” “...Are you feeling ok?”  
11.) “So this can’t be fixed of I baked you a cake? Took you on vacation? Killed your most hated enemy?”  
12.) “So that was a bad prank?” “He’s going to the hospital because you put ghost pepper sauce in his underwear and he said it felt like his dick was burning off -- of course it’s a bad prank!”  
13.) “I hope you know you’re going to hell.” “Well duh. That’s why I chained you up and it’s why I’m carrying you with me. I’ll need company when I check in.”  
14.) “You’re insane.” “Given the kinky shit you wanted to do last night, that seems a bit hypocritical of you to say.”  
15.) “I was hungry before I read your,job description. Now, I’ve seemed to have lost my appetite.”  
16.) “...Morgan Meepman?” “My cover-story, shush!”  
17.) “You got me and owl-themed blanket and and ancient book on the mages of Atlantis because you felt sad about someone breaking up with me 10 years ago?”  
18.) “How in the hell did you get in my house?!” “A deck of cards.” “Wait what? Now I’m actually interested.”  
19.) “Fire. Fire everywhere.” “No, honey, that’s the hallucinogenic talking.”  
20.) “So...you lied to me. About everything.”  
21.) “Did you really think this shit was necessary?”  
22.) “You spent $1,000 (or 855.33 Euro, 18,826.20 Mexican Peso, 62,414 Russian Ruble, 1,318.13 Canadian dollar, 1,351.75 Australian dollars, or 758.92 Pound sterling) on ink and pain?” “It’s called a tattoo and yes.”  
23.) “Did you just say ‘let the bodies hit the floor’ unironically?”  
24.) “So...you owe me a new phone, I hope you know.”  
25.) “I really appreciate this, but I have nowhere to put a 20-foot (6.09 meter) teddy-bear.”


	2. #16 Fill

This is #16: “...Morgan Meepman?” “My cover-story, shush!”  
For Lady_Kaze (https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Kaze/pseuds/Lady_Kaze)

So not everything was peachy-keen after Markus's revolution. There were terrorist organizations popping up out of nowhere, and the government wasn't exactly willing to give up human troopers for an "android problem".  
That's where Connor came in.  
He was the only one Markus knew could find where the terrorist leader was, arrest him, and get out safely now that he had removed the LED. And when Markus told him as much, he was all too willing to come up with a human allias.  
Hank noticed that the past two days, Connor had opted out of going to work, just to come home and see him with some file.  
On the third day, he had enough. "What the hell is in that folder?"  
Connor startled, "I'm sorry?"  
"No, don't be sorry," Hank rubbed his forehead, "just -- what's with the folder?"  
"Oh, that. Well Markus asked me to infultrate an android hate-group --" Connor said with a smile.  
"I can already see this going so wrong..."  
"Hank, please do not interup. This file is my fake human documentation."  
Hank paused. "Can I see it?"  
With a smile, Connor handed Hank the file, looking much like a child who jist learned how to use the toilet on their own, very proud of their own shit.  
Hank seemed to be impressed, bit after a minute, Connor caught him frowning slightly. "What's wrong?"  
"Morgan Meepman."  
"...Yes?"  
"Morgan. Meepman."  
"Yes."  
“...Morgan Meepman?”   
“My cover-story, shush!" Connor blushed blue, still not finding why Hank would act like that to his file name.  
"Jesus, Connor, it sounds like a childrens' book name!" Connor did not respond. "Connor, did you get that name from a childrens' book?"  
"No!" Connor defended. Hank waited for the inevitable response. "...It got it from a 'who done it game' often played at parties in the 2010s."  
"Oh my god , Connor, no."  
"Connor, yes?"  
"Connor, no."  
"Connor, no." The android looked like a kicked puppy. "Then what do I do?"  
"Let's sit on the couch. We will get you a great goddamn name before the night is done. One that actually fits you without being your actual name."  
And they did get a name by the end of the night: Steve Barnes. (;D)   
Now they just had to change all of the forged documentation.


	3. #19 Fill

This is #19: “Fire. Fire everywhere.” “No, honey, that’s the hallucinogenic talking."  
For Lady_Kaze (https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Kaze/pseuds/Lady_Kaze)

“Fire. Fire everywhere.”   
“No, honey, that’s the hallucinogenic talking." Deadpool said. Let it be known that he was not at fault for Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtle getting drugged by the goddman CIA.  
'Her name is Negasonic Teenaged Warhead, we've literally spent two entire movies knowing her.' White said, reminding him of nothing he cared about.  
'But!' Yellow interjected, always the stupidly fun one, 'Can you actually remember Vin Diesel's character's name after, like, a million Fast and Furious movies?'  
'...Groot?' White tried.  
"What is this?!" Deadpool heard Colossus yell from behind the door. Said door slammed open, and Wade could already tell he was going to be blamed for this.  
"It's the government's fault! Like pollution and hiding aliens!"  
"What?"  
"The CIA tried to kidnap her. I killed them, and I didn't even get money out of it, isn't that so sad?"  
"Quite, the Russian deadpanned.  
"Well, since I saved your kid, can I touch your butt?"  
Colossus grabbed the semi-conscious girl and slammed the door.  
Deadpool stared at the door as the voices went on quoting Finding Nemo.  
'He touched the butt.'


	4. #18 Fill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is #18: “How in the hell did you get in my house?!” “A deck of cards.” “Wait what? Now I’m actually interested.” For Allie ["And please make it Connor who breaks in ( I don’t care whose house it is.) Maybe Carl’s house with Markus. I honestly could see this boi breaking into houses with cards."]

Markus had a long day. He had a lot of long days, days where he had meetings on top of meetings on top of speeches on top of North's charming suggestions of killing people. So yes, he had a long day.  
So when Markus dragged himself into the house Carl willed to him and saw Connor sitting in front of his TV, he thought he was hallucinating. A quick diagnostic run, however, told him that Connor was actually there, while also reminding him that androids, deviant or not, were quite unlikely to have hallucinations.  
“How in the hell did you get in my house?!”  
“A deck of cards.” Connor replied with a growing smirk.  
“Wait what? Now I’m actually interested.” Markus gawffed, not being able to bring his processors around a deck of cards getting passed the improved security system. Leo himself had tried everything to get in and he had barely escaped.  
Connor tilted his head, much like how he had seem Sumo do it. "But..I,thought you were mad?"  
"But now,I'm too tired and curious to be mad. Tell me how you did it."  
Connor paused to take a deck of cards out of his inside jacket pocket. "Well, I got a set of tourist cards, each with its own unique picture of Detroit city highlights, from structures to sculptures." Connor showed Markus the deck, noting each unique picture. "I had seem your security in action against Leo, and had noted that it is a motion-based system. That gave me 0.02 seconds to throw the cards into the wall and block the camera's line of sight, which--"  
"Wait, you threw them into the wall? With all due respect, Connor, there is no way." Markus interrupted.  
"Would you like me to demonstrate?" Connor's LED turned yellow.  
"Sure." With Markus's confirmation, Connor stood from the couch and armed himself with one of the cards. After a second or two of aiming, Connor flicked his wrist, embedding the card in the wall, right next to a hole made by another card.  
"See, Markus? Completely possible." Connor looked so proud of himself, until --  
"CONNOR!" he heard Hank yell for him.  
"Oh, by the way, I texted Hank about you breaking into my house while you were explaining all that. I figure it was call him or call the actual police department." Markus smiled a charming yet guilty smile.  
"But, Markus," Connor did his best impression of Sumo when he wants a treat, "I broke in to give you a hug."  
"And you have me tips on how to improve my security, much more valuable." Markus continued to smirk, even as Hank' s footsteps grew closer.  
Connor suddenly smirked, as if a chesire cat. "Well, if that's your position, I guess you won't need any of my hugs anymore."  
"Wait, Connor, no."  
"Connor, yes."


End file.
